I was not religious a few years ago and didn’t keep a lot of melachas as well as basic and general principles in yidishkeit. It got to such an extent where I had relations with a goya and Baruch HaShem with Hashems help and watching shiurim and doing sincere Teshuva halev I was able to overcome my past and start a new life. As I learned more in yeshiva and learned more about the extent of my past sins, I learned that avraham avinu doesn’t pull out Jews from gehenom if they had relations with a goya since she covers his brit and is attached to his soul for eternity. Kvod harav, this really scared me and I can’t function correctly anymore, does this mean my sincere teshuva as well as Kiruv and sharing your shiurim as well as others doesn’t save me from the fact that I did such a horrendous and disgusting thing? I know teshuva is possible but from what I learned it said that avraham avinu doesn’t pull out Jews that had relations with a goya, will my teshuva from my heart and to the highest of sincerity not even fix this, so that I’ll be recognized as a Jew and be saved from gehenom having done full teshuva or am I doomed forever, not having any way to fix this from my previous chatayim? Looking forward to your reply Kvod harav

Asked on April 20, 2021