CAN I HAVE YOUR ATTENTION PLEASE

0:08On November 18th, 2006, I woke up from the surgery with a different body. My body had changed forever. Something happened during the surgery that altered my nervous system, and everything from my neck down to the bottom of my feet was in pain. It was not pain like a headache but pain as if you take a knife...

1:12My body started dying. I started bleeding from my eyes and every hole in my body. I got infections everywhere and no one could explain it. No one could explain the diagnosis. No one knew why I was screaming, and even later on when I tried to file an insurance claim because I had a disability policy, they rejected me after six months of research, saying it's impossible. If you want the money, you have to sue us. So, after two months, 62 days of a wonderful experience of Gehinnom... I eventually start getting back to my life. I'm only taking 20 painkillers a day instead of 50 or 60. I start managing, able to walk to some extent. I go back to work. Life is not the same, but I figured that I got a second chance. I still don't do teshuva. Nine months pass because that's the amount of time that Hashem gave me to do teshuva. I don't answer. He gives me a pain in my leg. I think I pulled a muscle. The next day, I'm in an emergency room, intensive care unit, undergoing a surgery that if I didn't come... At that time, if I had waited even another hour or two, the infection inside my body would have spread into my bloodstream, and I would have died within hours. So I spent the next two weeks in intensive care units next to people who are nearly dying; some are actually dying.

2:25Their screams sound familiar to mine. After a few weeks, I'm released from the hospital. I still don't do teshuva. Three months later, as you've noticed, the time keeps getting shorter. This is one of the signs from Hashem when He's running out of patience for you. The signs and the siyata dishmaya slowly disappear. To do teshuva is easy. The beginning is hard. To commit to Hashem is hard in the beginning. It’s a test in the beginning. But you do teshuva, you have miracles on a daily basis. Mamash, miracles. And I'm not exaggerating. I'm not a prophet. I'm not anything. You do teshuva in your early 20s, you have siyata dishmaya, that's unbelievable. You wait until your 70s, it's almost impossible for you to do teshuva. zero... because all I had in those days were many bottles just like this, like five or six of them, which were antibiotics, painkillers, and all types of things. I'm not taking them anymore, but just so you know, I had many, many of these. I had so many of them that I collected them.

3:33zero, because all I had in those days were many bottles just like this, like five, six of them, which were antibiotics and painkillers and all types of things. I'm not taking them anymore, but just so you know, I had many, many of these. I had so many of them that I could start a collection. I know the names, I know the doctors, I know the inventors. You become an expert. "No, doctor, this one doesn't work for me." He asks, "How do you know?" I say, "I tried it 50 times." But the other thing I have, something also very interesting that a lot of people like, is my nice gold business card. How much is it worth? Nothing. Why? Because when you're in pain, nothing's worth anything. I spent hundreds of thousands of dollars on doctors and medicine. I've become an experiment. I went to over 50 different doctors just to find a diagnosis, not even a cure. I gave up on a cure. Now all this time, the same way the money came in, it starts running out. And those friends, remember those friends I was telling you about? They weren't my friends anymore. They became enemies. They started stealing from me, cheating me, stealing my customers, and taking stuff from my office. They took advantage of every single thing they could, similar to an animal, I think it's called a vulture.

4:47So this continues for many, many years. Life becomes gehinnom. I want to end my life, but I only feel bad for two special women in my life, one of them being my wife, and the other one being my mother, who wouldn't stop crying over me, and I knew that I would ruin their lives if I died. But I got to a point where I couldn't walk. I had to use a cane. I became very antisocial. I would see my parents maybe once every few months. I wouldn't answer any phone calls. Business was going downhill, and problems were escalating. All of a sudden, the government started taking interest in some articles that I wrote about them, calling them out for being cheaters and liars. They started auditing my firm, and even though they couldn't find anything because, Baruch Hashem, everything was kosher, I couldn't stop them from torturing me, and they pretty much parked in my office. After they finished one audit, they brought another audit. At one point, I think it was in 2009 or 2010, I had six simultaneous audits, which only firms like Goldman Sachs and Merrill Lynch would have. And even they wouldn't have six of them at the same time. I was a tiny little firm. We would make money, but relative to the real firms, it was nothing. When Hashem wants you to get back to earth, He has His ways.

5:52And one of the things that I didn't realize is that the same One that brought me into this world is the same One that's doing it. He didn't forget me. He doesn't hate me. He's trying to save me. But as Shlomo HaMelech (King Solomon) says, "The pride of man will be his downfall." My ga'ava (pride) was my skill set, my ability, my money. Why should I worry about anything? Hashem (God) gave me something to worry about.