If You Have Anxiety Watch This

0:08Most people that have anxiety, which is unfortunately most people, have anxiety about their problems in life, whether it's money problems, marriage problems, divorce problems, kids problems, health problems, all types of problems. Baruch Hashem, this is a world of problems. That's the way Hashem wants it to be. Because problems are a way they're supposed to connect to HaKadosh Baruch Hu. But anyway, the reason why people, there's some people that, most people, they have problems and they get anxious, nervous, depressed. And there's a few tzaddikim that it seems like they don't have any problems until you get to meet them. And you see, they actually not only have problems, sometimes they have more problems than most people. But the difference is they treat them differently. They treat the problems differently. They look at the problems differently. Without going too deep into that issue, one of the reasons is because the overwhelming majority of anxiety that people have is actually about problems they don't have.

1:35it's problems they think they will have because of the way things look today. So, for example, a person is worried about not having money to pay the rent two weeks before the rent is due. So, yes, you're right. Today, if the rent were due today, you would not be able to pay it because you don't have the money. But HaKadosh Baruch Hu designed the world in such a way that today you don't have to pay the rent. It's due on the 15th. You still have two weeks. It's plenty of time for HaKadosh Baruch Hu to do whatever He needs to do to make sure that the money shows up. That's why the Gemara in Masechet Berachot has Rabbi Eliezer ben Horkenos. Rabbi Eliezer ben Horkenos says someone that has food to eat today but is worried about tomorrow has problems with Emunah. Has a tiny little baby Emunah. Meaning This person is worried about something that hasn't happened yet. People are worried about not finding a zivug. Why are they worried about not finding a zivug? Because they haven't found one today. Are you 85 yet? Oh no, you're still 20? You're still 25? You're still of marriageable age? You're still able to function? You're still able to walk? You're still able to see? You're not walking around with a cane? Okay, so the time hasn't come yet.

2:57People are worried now. I'm not going to, I have to do something, I have to do something. Many women come to me asking me the same question. What's the question? Should I freeze my eggs? Should I freeze my eggs? Why? Because unfortunately, in this generation, we had a change of ideology and a change of perspective regarding the position of a woman in the world. Apparently, people are convinced that we can bring children into the world without women. So we figured, you know, we don't need women to bring kids; we can just send the women to work. So the women went to work, and they woke up at 35, 38, 39, 40 years old. They realized, "Oh, wait a minute. I've been working for the last 20 years. I still don't have any kids. I still don't have any kids." It doesn't again marry. Why? I want to have kids because I'm running out of time and... Okay, but finding a husband that's willing to have these kids with you is not so simple anymore. Assuming you want a normal husband and not just somebody that is a roommate. So then they try to look for a zivug. And finding a zivug today is harder than finding a needle in a haystack. Because people are crazy, people are obsessive, people are materialistic and consumed. It's hard to find a zivug.

4:18You know, the young guys want to get married, but they can't find girls. The old guys that want to get married only want young girls who don't want them. And it's a mishmash of things. They call it a zivug crisis. I think it's a middot, an ideology crisis. The point being is that a woman comes to a point where she gets to 38, 39, 40 years old, and she's concerned that she hasn't found a zivug yet, so she asks me, should I freeze my eggs? Why? Because I'm afraid I won't find anybody to have a baby with. Now, you can freeze, you cannot freeze, you can put antifreeze, you can do whatever you want. But in reality, that is anxiety caused by problems that you don't have. Bli ayin hara. That is anxiety. You're worried you're not going to have kids. Why? Because you didn't have a husband yet. Why? Because you made certain decisions, right? Okay, fine. Why? Because you listened to people, instead of listening to HaKadosh Baruch Hu. Okay, fine. Let's try to change strategy. Let's listen to HaKadosh Baruch Hu and see how things change. Now you're going to start looking for a husband? Yes. Okay, good. So that's already good. Now you're going to do mitzvot? Yes. Okay, that's already two positive steps. This is very good. We're going in the right direction. Yeah, but what about the husband?

5:46Hold on a second. If you listen to Hashem, yes, Hashem says if you follow this Torah, He's going to bring you somebody. Yeah, what about the kids? I'm getting old. I'm 40 years old. Old according to who? The same people that gave you the advice not to get married 20 years ago. Obviously, their advice is flawed to begin with. Obviously, their advice is flawed to begin with. Why? Because they depend on nature. Pharaoh depended on nature. That's why Pharaoh lost. The Shnei Luchot HaBrit says that if you notice in the Pesach story that you're going to read soon, you're going to go over the Makot, the plagues. Each one destroys Egypt a little bit more. Pharaoh pretends that he's scared. He doesn't want it. Please, please, please. I'm sorry. Stop this plague. But he doesn't do his end of the bargain. And there's another plague and another plague until we get to Barad, the plague where there's hail.

7:14that's bringing hail to earth. The Midrash says that when Hashem stopped it, when Hashem stopped the hail, He stopped it in mid-air. Why? Because Moshe Rabbeinu was talking to Pharaoh. Pharaoh was crying, please, please, stop this hail that's ice with lava inside it. Only hitting the Egyptians that weren't scared of Hashem. Stop this. Please stop this lava everywhere. There's a volcano in every house. Stop it. I'm sorry. We made sins against Hashem. We have to do teshuva. So Moshe Rabbeinu screams to Hashem. Hashem stops the hail on the spot. Not, listen Moshe, let what I dropped... Let it hit the floor. I just won't drop anymore. I won't drop anymore. Let it stop. Meaning, after whatever is already in the air, 30,000 feet in the air, 20,000, 25,000, 15,000, 500 feet—it's about to hit the floor. Let the one that's about to hit the floor, hit the floor. After everything hits the floor, then we're finished. Why? Because...

8:42Now, what, I'm gonna bring everything back up. This is not hard for Him. We say Shehecheyanu, praise Hashem. He stops the hail on the spot. He brings the hail back into the atmosphere, and it's been standing there ever since. Part of it was used in one of the wars. The Midrash Ma'am Loez says that Yehoshua Bin Nun had... But the majority of it is still there waiting. For what? Gog and Magog. Now, Pharaoh got the point, right? So how come he went back again? How come he didn't let Yisrael go? How come? How come he didn't let Yisrael go? His heart was hardened. The Shelah Hakadosh says, we have a very interesting halacha. That HaKadosh Baruch Hu says in the Torah to Moshe Rabbeinu, this month is your Rosh Chodesh. Which month is He talking about? Tishrei? No. Nisan. But Nisan is not Rosh Chodesh.

10:09Nisan is not Rosh Chodesh. Tishrei is Rosh Chodesh, meaning it's the first month of the year. Rosh Hashanah is in Tishrei. But Hashem says the first Rosh Chodesh, Nisan, as if it's the beginning of the year. But it's not the beginning of the year, though. He says, for you, Moshe, it's the beginning. Why? Why until this day the Gemara in Masechet Rosh Hashanah says that there are four new years. There are four new years during the year for Am Yisrael. One of them is Nisan. Why? Why is Nisan the new year for Am Yisrael? Why? It says because when Pharaoh decided that he doesn't want to listen to Moshe anymore, this deal that they had, that he stopped the plague of all this hail and everything, he promised them he's going to free them, and he decided he reneged on the deal. Why did he renege on the deal? Because then his people, his necromancers, told him, "Listen, listen, before you free millions of people, think about this. Who's our god?" He says, "The goat. The little goat with the beard. Free beard." The Gemara says, "Why does Hashem give the goat a beard? To show you the beard is for free." So now,

11:29The goat is our god. He goes, oh, this month. This month is the month of the goat. Aries. That's our sign. Our god is more powerful this month. Our God is more powerful this month, so this month we can beat Moshe Rabbeinu. Pharaoh says, Chazak U'Baruch. Moshe, no deal. No deal, Moshe. Why not? Why no deal? I don't need you. I got my God this month, I got Aries. This God is the most powerful God. So HaKadosh Baruch Hu says to Moshe Rabbeinu this month, is your new year, is your new Rosh Chodesh. Yours, but not his. Yours, Am Yisrael, is where the power is going to be, not their power. HaKadosh Baruch Hu specifically made this the month. Why? To show us 3,300 years later that mazal is only for the goyim. It's Am Yisrael above the mazal.

12:37Am Yisrael does not have to depend on fortunes. Does not have to depend on fortunes. HaKadosh Baruch Hu, I want to tell you, listen, if I want something to happen for My children, I don't need it to happen at a specific time of the year. I don't need it to happen at a specific age. I don't need My children to depend on science and biology and Scientology and psychology and all types of ologies. My children are above nature. Why? I'm the one that's controlling it. I'm at the wheel. So who worries about having kids at a certain age? People that don't have Emunah in HaKadosh Baruch Hu. Who worries about not having Parnassah? People that have no Emunah and Bitachon in HaKadosh Baruch Hu. Who worries about not getting married? Who worries about anything? Someone that has a deficiency in their emunah. What if I can't find a job? Well, maybe the bigger problem is you should find God first. Why? Because the job is the least of your problems. The problem is you don't believe in God, that's the problem. You believe that God needs your help to find a job, that's your problem. Really, it's not the job. The job is easy. Why? The world...

13:59He can start a whole new company just for you. Well, it's big on Him. The problem is not the job. The problem is not the zivug. The problem is not the money. The problem is you not believing in God. Just like Pharaoh. So either you put on a nice little uniform like the Egyptians, or get yourself together and start having some emunah. This is a reminder, a reminder that all of the anxiety we have is simply because we do not believe in HaKadosh Baruch Hu. We don't. We're all liars. We're all fakers. Some more, some less. How do you get emunah? How do you get bitachon? You pass the tests. You pass the tests.

14:59First test: stop worrying about stuff that's not a problem currently. It may be a problem in the future, but it's not a problem today. Don't plan for retirement. Don't plan for the future ancestors as far as your money and your IRA accounts, your insurance accounts, you know, buying people's, you know... Love this life insurance. We used to have a life insurance business. By the way, you should call it death insurance. Why? Because the only time you get the money is if you die. And that's only 50-50. Why do you call it life insurance? You're never going to get the money while you're alive. It should be called death insurance, but it's not marketable. By the way, sir, when you die, your family's going to get a bunch of money. You're not going to be able to enjoy a penny out of it. And you're going to pay for the whole thing, but they're going to get the money. What a business. People buy all this insurance because they figure that this insurance is going to protect their family. Not HaKadosh Baruch Hu is going to protect their family. Insurance is going to protect their family. I'm not saying not to buy insurance, but if you really think that your family, all they have to rely on is this insurance, you have a very serious problem that no insurance in the world can fix.

16:24You have no emunah in HaKadosh Baruch Hu. So first things first, Rabotai HaKedoshim, stop worrying about problems that don't exist yet. Someone came to Rav Kanievsky. He told him, "Kvoda Rav, I need some advice. I'm about to retire in a few months and I have $250,000 in my pension. And I was thinking, I'm going to take it out." In one lump sum, I'm going to buy a house in this particular area in Eretz Yisrael. What does the Rav think? It's a perfectly simple question. You would think, yes or no, are the only options. No, that's not the only option. Rav Chaim Kanievsky says to him, come back to me when you actually have the money in your hands. Poor guy. You don't have the... Rav Kanievsky is not sitting with people, having lunch with them for three hours. That's not common. So that was the end of the meeting. So the guy now, for the next three months, is doing all types of teshuva. Why? He's like, why is Rav Kanievsky, the Gadol HaDor, Sar HaTorah, giant of giants, telling me, come to me when you actually have the money in your hand?

17:43Does he see through his Ruach HaKodesh that I'm never going to get the money? That in reality, it's all a Ponzi scheme? That in reality, we're going to lose the money a day before I retire? That in reality, I'm going to die before I... I'm never going to see it. I'm going to die. Poor guy, misken, three months. He is doing all types of tikkunim. Why? He has no idea what's going on. Why the Gadol HaDor, the biggest rabbi in the world, is telling me, come to me only when you have the money in your hands. Is he implying I'm not going to have it in my hands? Maybe I'm not going to have hands. As you would know it, three months later, on the clock, the company says bye-bye. Writes him a check. Here's your pension check. Enjoy your life, sir. He's relieved. He runs to Rav Kanievsky. Kvodo Harav, Kvodo Harav, I got the money. I got the money. I got the money. Okay, okay. So should I buy it? What? The house. Oh yeah, you should buy it. That's it? Yeah, buy the house.

18:46Nothing else? No, just buy the house. What do you want, a chiddush? What do you want, a chiddush about it? Why? He says, why didn't Kavod HaRav tell me to buy the house three months ago? He says, because three months ago it wasn't a realistic question. I didn't have the siyata dishmaya to tell you yes or no. HaKadosh Baruch Hu didn't tell me three months in advance. That's prophecy. I don't have prophecy. You ask now, Hashem, because it's a real problem now. It's a real issue now. It's a real question now. Hashem wants to help you through me. So I pray, I learn, I do everything. You ask me a question, HaKadosh Baruch Hu will give me the answer. When? When the problem actually exists. Until then, it's just imaginary anxiety. If a person really applies what we just said over the last few minutes in their life, life becomes peaches. Life becomes just amazing. Why? You live without worries until it's necessary to worry. And even then, if you have enough emunah during the other times, where you're not just suffering quietly,

20:09When there are really things that are problems, you know that the same HaKadosh Baruch Hu that helped you all these other times will help you today also. This, Rabotai HaKedoshim, is one of the foundations, one of the foundational principles that Hashem gifted to us in order to enjoy this world. Which means that when a person does not enjoy this world because he's constantly anxious about stuff that hasn't happened yet, it's his fault. He is choosing to suffer. I don't even think it's counted as kaparat avonot in Shamayim. Like the stress that he has or she has about things that haven't happened, I'm not really sure if it counts as kaparat avonot at all. It may count a little bit, but not significantly. Why? Because it's a problem that you're inventing. It's not a problem that Hashem actually gave you. The problem is you don't have emunah in Hashem. That's not Hashem's fault.